Courtesy - thesituationist.wordpress.com

It is the season of Love. Is love seasonal?, you may ask. Isn’t it supposed to be all consuming, all pervading and everlasting? Yes and No! I call it the “season of love” because Valentine’s Day is around the corner and lovers all over the world are getting all mooney-eyed and all lovey-dovey. The cynics believe that we don’t need a special day to celebrate love. If you love someone, you celebrate everyday with them. But the romantics, on the other hand, have a grand Valentine’s Day in mind, thoughtfully selecting a gift for their loved one and planning ahead to reserve a table for two for a romantic dinner at a posh restaurant , watch romantic movies together, go on a holiday or do other romantic things together. Taking advantage of the celebratory mood, shops stack up on flowers, heart shaped chocolates, candies, cards and special gifts that declare love. Hoteliers come up with special days or nights dedicated to love to lure the romantics at hearts.

The disagreements regarding Valentine’s day do not end here. Some believe that St.Valentine had nothing to do with love. Some others are of the opinion that St. Valentine endorsed all kinds of love, not just romantic love. Hence Valentine’s Day is for all your loved ones including your family and friends. They strongly rebuke the current trend of earmarking this day only for lovers. Yet there are others who believe that St Valentines was a Roman priest and conducted marriages for lovers secretly. There was a notion that unmarried men made better soldiers, and in the wake of this theory, marriages were banned. Our man, probably a romantic at heart, found this to be a gross injustice and held marriages secretly to aid those in love.

And we think all is well with the world. But no! There are so many maddening theories on the concept of love itself. What is this love anyway? Is this just a gooey-mushy-corny-cheesy feeling you have for someone? Or is it something deeper that stands the test of time? There is the kind of love that gives u a fluttering heart, sweaty palms, weak knees and an ability to giggle endlessly (if you are a girl), say completely ridiculous things and make a fool of yourself (if you are a guy) or get completely tongue tied and forget all your well-rehearsed lines. But is this love or just a more fascinating cousin called infatuation? Then there is the “IF” love, which is totally selfish and conditional. “If” someone does something for you, you love them. That is more like a need-based love. Then there is the “Because” love. You love someone for a reason and probably as long as the reasons last. This is also conditional to an extent. And there is an “In spite of” love. This means, regardless of what a person does, you still love them. Now this is the rarest, yet the purest form of love.

Doesn’t matter what the theories state, I feel that earthly love is, has always been, will always be “need-based”. One would think that parents have unconditional love for their kids, hence they provide them with comforts unconditionally. Now this is not entirely true. Most parents are hoping that their kids will look after them when they are old. Some even decide to have kids early so that by the time they become old, their kids are old enough to take care of them. And yet, there are others who think that one should never expect anything from kids. That seems very selfless. But the whole idea behind having kids is to fill the vacuum in one’s life or the need to cradle and nurture. So there! That doesn’t sound very selfless any more. And more over, kids are your own. How does loving someone that is your own (as opposed to someone that has nothing to do with you) make it selfless? And what about the love one has for friends? Isn’t that a need-based one too? I believe that the casual friendships to the deeper ones are all rooted to some need. In a more casual friendship, your need would be fun, entertainment, or partnership (activity partners). In a more deep association, it is comfort, companionship and security. Romantic love is no different from this. Even those who make boringly long (to others, not to the ones in love) and passionate speeches on love are in it because they get something out of it. It is their need to love or to be loved, or to feel special and wanted. If you get nothing, but unhappiness out of a relationship and if you are still in it, then you must be a masochist. So there! The most divine thing on planet is not all that divine. But despite the difference in opinions and all the cynicism, Iam sure that warm fuzzy feeling inside you is indeed lovely. So celebrate love. Have a Happy Valentine’s day!

Courtesy - business-fundas.com

This is not a sequel to Gabriel Marquez’ classic ‘Love in the times of Cholera’.  But it is nevertheless nothing less important, if I may say so myself . Most of us, who are in the right side of 30 really live in the internet. Social networking sites have taken our lives in the most revolutionary way. And no wonder this extends to our friendships and relationships. There are people who “meet up” on Facebook, orkut or other social networking sites and become friends over the internet. Some of these friendships die an early death, some of them last forever (forever being till the next fascinating or revolutionary thing come around.) Some people actually make an effort to meet up in real and give it a different dimension to their facebook friendship. Yet there are others who know each other, but rarely exchange a word or even pleasantries when they meet face-to-face, but they are such bumchums in the online world. Weird ain’t it?  It becomes weirder when it is a romantic relationships. Social networking sites, along with the emails, chat options, and mobile phones make dating easy for the youngsters. Asking a girl out for coffee can be simply done over a text message. There is no stuttering, sweaty palms, pounding heart or  going week in the knees. Or even if there is, nobody knows as you get to do it  (texting, I mean) in the comforts of your home. There is no trouble of  getting the age old “love letter” to the  recipient of your affections, no days of wondering if your  little brother’s , friends’ cousin delivered the letter to your love or to her dad, no days of anticipation and sleeplessness waiting for a reply. You can direct your message to the right person at the right time  and get an immediate reply (unless your recipient chose to do otherwise). Even those who are having long –distance relationships find it easier because they can stay in touch easily.

Just as technology made loving so easy, it has made breaking up that much more difficult. In the olden days, it took courage to fall in love, to be at the receiving end of the parental wrath and flak of the society (apparently good girls from good families don’t fall in love because the bad boys are just taking them for a ride) , the fear of getting caught and all that angst of being in love. Breaking up with your love or even being ditched was so much easier. All you had to do was make sure you don’t bump into the said love. After few days of silence and few nights of weeping into the pillow, you are good to go.  Break ups are not so easy today. To begin with, you should control that urge to contact your ditcher (yeah, new word coined by me). The most important step would be to erase your ex-lover from your memory and the first step in this direction would be to make sure you do not see each other. But that is not enough. You need to delete his contact number from your mobile, lest you contact him in a moment of weekness. You are happy about this smart move and give yourself a pat on your back. But the moments of weakness do appear at the most inappropriate times and in that desperation, you frantically search your text messages for his message and find his number in the recipient details. That is when it hits you that you should delete all his messages too. But being the smart woman that you are, you delete them too. But you read every mail you exchanged with each other, every chat conversation you had and cry buckets. That is when you realize that you need to delete the mails and chats too. But only once you deleted them, you realize that you have nothing to hold on to. That is when you start obsessively checking his facebook and orkut for new pics, new updates, new comments etc. When the obsession reaches psychotic levels, you delete him from your social networking sites as well. Loving is easy in the times of facebook, breaking up is not.

From groans to throes of anticipation, the day adjudged as St Valentine’s Day or cut shortly Valentine’s Day has a varied sense of reactions from people all across the globe. No longer seen as a ‘west’ only festival, youngsters and adults alike celebrate this special day, highly infected by commercialism. People view the 14th of February in many a sense, in a religious view, in an ethical standpoint and so on. But for the general crowd its a day to show their love to their special one, be it you spouse, loved one, parents and friends love has no bounds, although it has a romantic tag attached to it.

If there were days that ensues so much of attention from the world, this is one of them. The Red color associated with romance and love can be seen adorned in everyplace across cities. From a medieval festival to worldwide phenomenon, Valentine’s day has certainly come a very long way.

It sure would look unfair that love should be given special attention only one day when it should be genuinely shown throughout the year, but then again why celebrate birthdays when you already know that you were born every day of the year. Its the got this certain flair attached to it. Sure you should love your loved one every single day of the year, but shouldn’t there be a day to completely splurge? Valentine’s day can be seen as that day rather than viewing it from a negative perspective, although it certainly has attracted wrong intentions, the essence still remains the same. Used right it ends up a joyous day otherwise not so. Its up to each person to bring out their creativity, love and affections for making the day worthwhile.

For those who wish to have a little help in their love life, here are some tips on how to make it a memorable day, go ahead try something on your won too, most certainly for such things the though does count too.

Gifts
How do you express your love? How do you make your loved one feel special, pamper them to glory, get them a special gift, be it for a man or a woman, everyone loves a gift. Here are some ideas for gifts you can get him/her.
Cards
Valentine’s day is a highly anticipated day for card makers after Christmas and New Year. The day is not complete without a card. And of course these will be adorned with hearts and what not, but go for the one that may suit your loved one the most. Don’t just blankly buy the first pink/red heart card with hearts sprawled across it. Go a step ahead and make on on your own, there is nothing more special than that handmade touch. There are several how-to-do’s on card making if you are not the craftsman exactly.
Collage
Create a photo collage of all the special times spent with your loved one. Have notes written beside each picture to describing the fun you had that day, years later when you look at him, it sure will stir memories and emotions. You can also create a scrapbook filled with notes and poems and songs you both like. Fill it with pictures and you get a worthwhile gift, precious as any other gift.
Soft toys
What is with everyone and these soft,cuddly and warm toys……well it sure makes a point. From tiny key chain sized toys to the giant teddyzilla sized ‘monsters’, the degree of shape and size vary. But it sure can leave its mark on your loved one’s heart.
Perfumes/Cologne
Get him/her their favorite Cologne/perfume, the really expensive one that they use sparingly. There is something about smells that provokes associated memories, if you happen to be walking to walking in a crowded shop and you happen to catch the scent of what your loved one wears, that can be enough to catch you off guard.
Gift Voucher-the real kind
Get him/her a gift voucher with lots of moolah(that’s money to the layman) to spend on himself/herself. This is one gift they will not want to exchange since they can get anything their heart desires, within the limit!
Gift Voucher-the fake kind
Of course you can go for the cute, original and unique vouchers. Cut papers into coupons and have simple yet thoughtful promises written down on it, like say “this coupon entitles you to a breakfast in bed and smothering by me” or “this coupon entitles you to be taken shopping anywhere with no grumblings from me what so ever”. The list can go on and on and the best thing is that you will end up feeling good about it more than if you did spending money on your loved one.
Jewelery
Of course how can we not forget the baubles and such that make up a lot of the average gifts you can expect to give or receive. But the right ones can be a testament to time and last ages and invoke memories. Going for the unique and special one is always worth the effort. Be it diamond rings, heart shaped pendants, crystal pieces ( Swarovski has some of the classiest collections) they all can make your loved one’s heart skip a beat. Of course it doesn’t just apply to men, women can also get men masculine jewelery.
Chocolates/munchies
As much as I hate to admit it, heart shaped chocolates has found a centerpiece position as a standard Valentine’s day gift. If you creativity or you wallets have limits, get some chocolates but get the message clear to your loved one on how much you love him/her. But all is not dead for confectioneries, bake/make/cook something on your own. Even if it ends up in disaster, present it and there is no way the person you love will reject it. After all this will be the highest test to the quote “Its the thought that counts”. If not then the best place to look is at a level 5 answers which is antagonist.

Of course the list can go on and on, the amazing thing about the human mind is that there is no bounds to our thinking. Go ahead and do the outrageously romantic or the perennially sane, but make sure you do it, rather than incur that wrath of your loved one.

That said about gifts, you can also have spend an amazing day with your loved one or do something special. Here are some idea’s on what you two can do together.

Things you can do together

Candlelight Dinner
Must I elaborate? We all seen the movies and read stories, try to grasp what that is portrayed and recreate the practical part. It can be at a fancy restaurant or cook it yourself and have it atop your terrace or dining room.

Going out
Take the day off and spend it like you have nothing to do for the next 100 years, forget office deadlines, work shifts, etc. Enjoy the day in a carefree manner. Go out, take a long romantic drive, go to the beach, eat out, go for a movie, hangout with friends, be together, anything works. Sometimes the simplest things can give the greatest joy.

Out in the open
Plan something really romantic or outrageous. Let the world see how much you love that person, although be sure to not step on anyone’s toes. Our society is still has yet to loosen up.

Slouch at home
Sit at home and have a marathon of a romantic movies, order take out and take comfort in spending the day in each others company.

Still helpless on deciding what to do? Don’t fret Kochi’s party scene is here to help out, here is a list of the hot and happening parties where you can smash a groove with your loved one.

Valentines Day Party At Ava
Firstly we got a hot party out at Ava Lounge where our own DJ Arvee is playing along with a host of other DJs. Ava is one hot place for the best parties. Party on from 12 pm onwards.
check here fore more info.

Black Valentine at Sand dunes
Sand dunes the Persian cafe is hosting a party. Black is the dress code hence the title. A somber change from the usual red.
check here fore more info.

V-Day Blowout Party At Hotel Park Central
A party by Green Harbour at Hotel Park Central.
check here fore more info.

Valentine’s Bash Noon party at Glow
Glow, Harbour View’s party floor is hosting a set of pre-valentine’s day party on the 13th and a noon party on the 14th.

It is always upto how each person prefers to spend the day that finally depends on what you do on this day.

Singles
Well there is one set of people left out for this day, Singles. It is kind of a day that is dreaded by them, the reason more over because of the recent year’s hype before the season. Its brings out the fact of your isolation from the whole festivities and you are literally reminded of the fact that you are single and with no one to spend the day with. Most singles who go through this sort of tend to hate Valentine’s day.
The whole concept of the day being a day for love brings out the fact that they are single and to an extend some single women and men call it ‘Single Awareness Day’, because it strongly reminds them of the company they are deprived of. And not helping them at all is that the initials spell out ‘S-A-D‘.
But enough moaning about your conditions, there is always a silver lining. It is upto us to find that lining or assume so. True it will be a huge depression motif seeing the decorations for Valentine’s day put up everywhere you go and seeings couples hanging out but buck up, there sure are ways you can also have fun on the 14th!

Me-day
One of the pros of being single is more money to spend on yourself! Buy yourself the best in town, chocolates, dresses, watches, the works. Pamper yourself silly and don’t feel guilty about it. It is your right to feel happy on this biased day.

Friend’s day out
What will really help is also being with friends on that day when you least want to be alone. Party, hang out, go for a long drive, explore, have fun! Do it in a coed ‘all-single’ crowd, allow couples if they really want to join you. It will help you to really have a blast of the day. Take a trip to level 6 answer at narnia.

Help out
Doing social work and helping out your fellow man will help in self satisfaction. Bring happiness to others and you can tend to forget your woes.

Buy a Pet
Having a pet is another thing, it totally takes up your time. You have someone to express your feelings upon.

Movie Marathon
Call friends over with refreshments and a whole load of snacks and have a movie marathon. Watch comedy, action, horror or any sort of movie non stop. It will definitely be fun watching movies and spending the day with your closest set of friends. There is nothing more than friends to take your mind off your woes.

So. everyone out there intending to spend Valentine’s day, be it couple or singles, have a wonderful day.
Happy Valentine’s Day!